Small Miracles

If you had told me this story in nursing school, I would not believe it. My Dad’s white cell count came down from 66,000 to 37,000. They weaned him down to 13 mcg of Levophed (maintaining blood pressure) and increased his fluids. His kidneys still aren’t working, but his lab values show that he has kidneys left that could probably be kickstarted by taking him off of the continuous dialysis. Seriously? He’s still on FULL life support. If somebody turned the hospital power off, that would be it. However, he’s responding. He moved his arms and legs voluntarily today and when I offered to clean out his mouth with suction, he nodded. Whoa.

He did well through the day. His blood pressure came up and they weaned him further down to 8 mcg. They are keeping him sedated but they are now doing tube feedings to strengthen healing. He’s a fluid-shifting nightmare, putting fluid in his tissues in the form of swelling and then having it pulled off by dialysis. However, it’s working, largely because of the strength of his heart. Most heart muscles can’t take that kind of fluid overload especially old abused ones but his is in good shape. My grandfather’s heart was in super shape too. He walked around the golf course until he was 90. I am really hoping I have that kind of cardiac DNA. I spent most of the day watching in awe as he got better, his BP teetering on the minimum parameter and the gutsy nurse who had the stones to wean the Levophed and compensate with fluid and dialysis. Strong nursing work there.

Afterward, I found my energy and outlook slightly more positive, although I now begin to grapple with what will he be like when he comes out of this? Will he still be a grumpy tyrant who demeans women? Will he be the sweet young man I fell in love with when I was 3? Will he find God? I don’t think my patience is strong enough to endure the grumpy tyrant. Our relationship would no longer have a second chance. However, it’s possible that we may find common ground. Certainly, I am optimistic about that possibility. Every little girl needs her Dad, whether she’s 3 or 46. At 46, there are boundaries.

And speaking of grappling, I stopped off at G3 America TKD for a Jiu-Jitsu class. All men of course, except me. All of them were Brazilian and they spoke Brazilian but mustered English for my sake. The instructor, Daniel Roman is a Brown belt. He’s very patient. We did an extensive warm-up. I think he was trying to see what I could tolerate. He then taught a sweep move, followed by a new way to pass guard. It’s a little more brutal, but I liked it. My Brazilian partner was younger than I and clearly not used to women in class from a cultural standpoint. His name was Marcios. I’m thinking he was in his late 20’s. He didn’t like touching me and when I got him in guard, I could tell he was REALLY uncomfortable. HA! Anyway, when he did the technique, he was very slow and gentle. It’s more of a bump and roll kind of move but he didn’t want to throw me. I told him it was okay and that if he didn’t throw me, I would choke him out. LOL! We practiced the move a few times and then Daniel partnered with me for “sparring.” Oh! We are going to spar? Didn’t see that one comin. So for six minutes, which seemed like an eternity, Daniel put me in positions where I had to either do the new move, pass guard, escape side mount, try a move (I tried an arm bar without any luck). There were times when I controlled him but then didn’t know what to do to get him to tap. I think this is pretty common for beginners. Anyway, he was really smooth at how he executed his moves and he made me use my hips to escape a lot.

Back to Marcios for six minutes. Poor Marcios couldn’t seen to get around the fact that I was a girl. He came at me and tried to pin me down with a mount but he gave me too much space. I went for Triangle leg choke. I didn’t get his arm, but I DID get my leg up and around his neck. I locked it off and hung on while he tried to get out of it. I rested for a good minute before I let him go. He wasn’t getting anywhere and I was worried about his neck… and his pride. I didn’t think he’d tap and the last thing I needed to do was choke out one of Daniel’s students. J We worked some more and he got me in mount at the end. I tried a few things. Bump wasn’t working but the bell rang and I was off the hook. Daniel told Marcios, “See? Watch out when you work with girls.”

Then I got to grapple with the owner of the studio. He sort of reminded me of KJN Gary. He’s an Olympic level TKD artist but he is just learning Jiu-jitsu.  Clearly, he had come to class more often than Marcios. Within 3 minutes, he had me arm-barred and I tapped. Damn. I escaped side mount, did the new move and passed guard a couple of times. I guillotined him but didn’t go for the submission because I didn’t know we were really going for the submission. I was just pleased as punch to get the guillotine. Yay! He got out of it and then got mount. He sat so high on my chest that no matter how many times I bumped him he stayed right where he was. He then locked my arm and I knew I was soon in trouble. He went for the arm-bar. I knew there had to be a defense but I couldn’t remember it. I turned my thumb out and he didn’t catch it. He bent my elbow up but I didn’t tap. I tried to roll but I couldn’t. I did get my left hand on my fist and tried to pull free. We worked this for a minute and then the timer went off. I didn’t tap. Ha ha! I’d have lost on points for sure though.

It was a great experience. Nice guys. Very skilled instructor and safe. We talked about lots of stuff and took a photo. It was fun. I realized that my martial arts practice strengthens me on the inside, not simply because I am a woman in a man’s world but because it’s more than brute force and strength. Jiu-Jitsu is a thinking person’s art. It flows and you have to look for hidden opportunities. It’s a lot like fighting a snake. There are times to slither and times to strike. I am looking forward to working with Prof. Elliot.

I ran a couple of miles this morning. It was flat mostly.